to: KAAASAE

(its strange how we never really called ourselves that
even though the name existed)

please read till the very end.

Anna wasn't there that day, but I chose this photo because it makes me glad that you guys actually put in the effort to blindfold me and surprise me on my birthday. Like, every year. & you guys always had cute presents and cards for me. Baby shoes, big cards and all. Or is it cause I'm gullible enough? haha.

Also, I feel really bad that we didn't properly celebrate Kaiying and Annia's birthday.

Here's from valentine's 2009.
All of us still single and available on valentine's,
chatting away at Shoduko @ Raffles city.


Friday fornight @ PS
(we used to have these friday fortnight things!)


Evoke dance competition where we supported Annia

I realised we don't have much pictures with ALL 7 of us, but that's fine. It used to be either Anna or Ali who's missing (tsktsk, haha!), but now I think I'm the one who's always missing.

Remember those times, just a few months ago, we had so much fun together, the 7 of us.

Somehow, yesterday felt different, and its probably cause of me (as in, only I felt different). I guess you guys were fine about it (though we really didn't do anything much), I wonder what made me feel so odd yesterday. For the first (or maybe second/third) time in my whole life, I felt so different from all of you.


You're all doing well in your studies, in the good and the better schools, while I'm alone in my new school, this neighbourhood JC.
Due to my short attention span (I really hate studying),
I'm on the verge of retaining. I'm damn sure I'll get retained.

You've got AHS friends AND your new friends,
while I've only got my new friends right here.
(and some aren't even surviving, you may ask if you wish)


I blame it on my VERY short concentration/attention span. Its true, I guess I'm really not suited for JC but one of the reasons why I chose this path was cause I didn't want my life to change so drastically. I know its stupid of me, but friendship means alot to me. Atm, it means more than my future career, I don't have anything in mind anyway. But I just feel so unsure now.

Of course, its also because I do like some of the subjects here and I like the idea of going to school. Its abit like secondary school, and it makes me feel safe. I don't want to grow up, actually. I like the idea of a uniform, it makes me feel protected and still young. The world out there, its competitive and horrible, and you don't get nice teachers such as the ones in SR.


Don't mean to sound emo, but that word's insecurity. I think its the stuff I say now, or the way I act, I think I've changed, and we don't have so many common topics anymore.

Sometimes I wonder if I'm still the Emma you guys liked, and what on earth do you think of me? If I were you, I would've hated Emma Fung now. I don't know how to put it, I might really have changed for the worse. When I've got nothing else to talk about, I talk about.. yeah. You think my life's revolved around that?! Hell no, I've just got nothing to talk about.

Life's fine there (or here, in SRJC), its fun sometimes and terrible sometimes, but I'm surviving. I have friends too (regarding that, there's more I must tell you all about), but its just so different when you guys aren't really on the same frequency as me. During dinner, I did not have half a clue on what you all were talking about.



& when one of you asked why aren't I doing well in geography, I knew a very big reason was cause I didn't exactly touch human geog and fell asleep during that. But even if I did study, I wouldn't have gotten an A or B because it is a tough subject afterall. Nobody really gets an A or B for geog. But I felt so STUPID when I had to give you an answer to my grade.

I felt so stupid when you were so shocked because my school was SO SLOW in economics. Okay, sure. Besides that fact, I really don't think my school sucks. My teachers are great, and its really better than expected.




What is this feeling of inferiority, I thought it'd never bother me.


I don't like it when people call me emo, actually. Try understanding me (and you never will), try experiencing it. I maybe be over sensitive at times, or perhaps a little exaggerated, but I'm pretty damn sure life isn't as hard for you all.

You'll always have your old friends in school to count on, at least.

Well, looking through these photos made me much happier.

Cause it reminded me that we were still quite close not too long ago.

Annia,
I still feel quite close to you somehow.
Thanks for being my first ever friend in AHS (bff),
and for making me feel so comfortable around you
even though we seldom get to meet up.
You never ever made me feel inferior,
even though you're like so smart and all.
Thanks for helping me with my work and..

I love you Annia Hsu!!!

Ashley,
although our talks usually revolve around the same thing LOL.
Still glad you always ask me out to study and stuff.
Well I guess we do talk about alot of other stuff,
and I'm looking forward to seeing you soon!

Kaiying,
I think I've irritated you quite abit with my whining,
catch up with you soon!
Idk why I don't know what to type her right now,
but I've got quite alot to say.
ohyes, thanks for testing me econs and writing the notes down for me at startbucks that day! :D


Anna,
sorry I haven't replied to your emails yet.
I wanted to write one to you today, but was studying.
I miss studying with you,
and talking to you online almost every single day.
I really do miss those times.
& I think I'm the one who's creating this gap.


Alicia (I haven't seen you since my birthday),
but we seldom run out of topics,
you're happy-go-lucky and crazy like me,
hanging out with you is actually very fun!!!

Siyun, I don't have a photo with you I realised :O
You know, I feel like your kid sometimes HAHA.

That's all I gotta say for now,

forgive me for acting so strange yesterday. I'm sorry.

I'm feeling much better after looking at the photos. I love you guys alot, afterall.